Life, Loss and to Live Again – Online Counselling

Facing a New Year đź’”

I haven’t written a blog or post for some time – I have been processing my own grief, after the loss of my husband last January, 2024.  And as I’m coming up to the 1-year anniversary, I felt it was time for me to write.  Writing is such a therapeutic process – of which I plan to write about in a later post. As a therapist, I have tried to follow all those “suggestions” I’ve recommended to my clients, and I have to say it has/is such a difficult journey mixed with tears, sadness, laughter, numbness, determination, and …. such an emotional “roller coaster ride”.   (NOTE – I’ve had many personal losses and this one has been difficult to navigate – l will write about losing a spouse, at a later date.  Remember, every person grieves differently, and each loss is unique.)

Facing a new year with our loss can be incredibly challenging.  I invite you to look at some ways to help you cope.

  • Reflect on Memories: Take time to remember the times you shared.
  • Set Small Goals: Focus on small and achievable goals for the new year – giving a sense of purpose and direction.
  • Connect with Others: (This one can be difficult, as many of us don’t want to feel like a burden or making others feel uncomfortable) Reach out to friends, family or support groups.
  • Create a Tribute: Create a photo album, journal, or special place in your home.
  • Practice Self-Care: This is SO important – make sure to take care of yourself physically and emotionally.  Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation
  • Seek Professional Help: Consider speaking to a therapist/counsellor for support.

Remember, it’s okay to feel a range of emotions – be gentle with yourself, grief takes time. If you are looking for support, I’m here to help

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Significant Person Loss

We have all experienced losses throughout our life and some of these losses leave deeper scars than others – and all need healing. Relational losses vary for everyone and each stands alone, not to be compared to another – from the passing of those close to us – family (spouses, siblings, children [including the unborn], relatives) and friends; to break-ups, separations, and divorces.

Each one is different and cannot be compared. Counselling therapy can help with this grief.

“You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.” – John Kabat-Zinn

Pet Loss

“No one loves you unconditionally as your beloved pet” – Cynthia Dobesh

Our pets are our family and when we lose them or must make the decision to re-home them or have to put them down – we are heartbroken. Our pets love us unconditionally, and they often are the ones we can tell our deepest and sometimes darkest secrets to – knowing that those thoughts are safe with our pets. Never to be told and never to be judged by them. Pet Loss is disenfranchised grief – a grief that others may not understand or may even dismiss, and yet the process is so very real – we love them so deeply, knowing full well that we are most likely going to outlive them.

“Until one has loved an animal, a part of one’s soul remains unawakened.” – Anatole France

Life, Loss, and To Live Again Online Counselling with Marcia

Injury/Illness Loss

So many times a person’s grief goes undetected or is overlooked because of the nature of the illness or injury and sometimes this grief may lead to questioning one’s self-esteem, sense of worthiness, and mental health (including suicidal ideation). How does one cope with their illness or injury and find hope, when they are grieving the loss of what was and what is now – straddling a line between the past and the present?

Career Loss

Your company is downsizing and you have been let go; you have finally reached retirement and you don’t want to or don’t know what to do with yourself; you’ve been fired and are wondering where you go from here; or your company has decided to transfer you to another city. The grieving process associated with the loss of a job is similar to other kinds of loss. Being open and honest as to the why, can help with moving towards “where do I go from here” or “what do I do now”?

Ghosting

How do you mourn someone who is still alive??

When someone disappears from your life without an explanation (ghosting), it can make you feel sad and confused.  It’s like losing something important, and it can bring up strong feelings like shock, anger and denial.  You might keep asking yourself why it happened, which can make you feel rejected and confused.

 

Dealing with these feelings is a bit like healing an emotional wound.  Talking about it can help you work through these grieving emotions, where one eventually reaches a point of understanding and then acceptance.  This process is important for your well-being, helping you find healthy ways to cope and making you stronger for future relationships.

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